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How Familiarity Governs Racial Empathy

Benjamin Watson

Sep 14, 2021
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I had to check myself. I’m sitting in the comfort of my home watching an uncomfortable event unfold. The man is violently kicking this woman for no apparent reason. An Asian pedestrian walking in New York City, was knocked to the ground by a stranger, who then began stomping on her chest and head. It took a second to convince myself this was real. Why would anyone do such a thing? My skepticism kept my outrage at bay, but soon my humanity was fully engaged. There was no longer an excuse to withhold my disdain. But still, my response was measured, well-controlled. I was flirting with feeling numb.

Was I bothered? Yes, it was horrific to watch. But I wasn't texting friends about it. In fact, I was thinking about what was next on my schedule that day. We were in the middle of a cross-country relocation with seven children. And it was the feeling that I could simply move on and enjoy the rest of my afternoon after seeing such a horrible attack, that had me checking my heart, my mind and my spirit.

There are so many fights to fight, which ones do we engage? There is so much injustice in the world, how do we decide which ones to lend our voice? But it's more than that. As a Black man, a descendent of enslaved people, who has spent countless hours trying to convince others of the perpetual injustices people endure daily, I believe I am a bit jaded. Jaded by the pain of others when I have seen so much pain in my community. Jaded by the immediate legislative movement against hate done to other communities while hate against the Black community seems to be an acceptable casualty of American society. Neither is right.

As a man of faith, I must always seek justice and speak up for innocent victims no matter the ethnicity, but I must say, I had to check myself. Familiarity with pain influences how we react to it. I am unfamiliar with daily violent acts of hate against Asian-Americans in the streets of America. Though this was foreign to me it represents an opportunity for growth. Maybe, just maybe, many white Americans are like how I was that day. You see, you hear, you shake your head and then move on to the next obligation of the day. This may not be done out of hate for the victim, but when it is not you, or someone like you, the reaction is measured. I seek to have a heart, an empathy that extends beyond my personal experience and embraces the experiences of others, both at home and abroad, as if their experiences were mine.

The book of Proverbs compels me to “Speak for those who cannot speak for themselves”, to judge fairly and defend the rights of the poor and needy. Vulnerability is not only about economics, sex or age, it is ultimately about a lack of power and an inability for their voices to elicit the force necessary for their own defense. Everyone may find themselves in a state of injustice at some point and because of this, it behooves us to stand for those who at the current moment cannot. That is what God does for us. He feels each groan, sees each tear, and stands up for the powerless. So must we.

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4 Comments

  • Alice Sue Dabney
    applause
    • 35w
  • Roberta Carnes Moore
    love your posts.
    • 35w
  • Pendy Cavaleri Bowers
    Such good words.
    • 35w
  • David Gene Bronson
    Mr. Watson, what it boils down to is this, we fail to see people as they really are. Made in the image of a Holy God. If we look at people in that light, we stop hating each other, we stop killing each other, we stop treating people as unequal but defe…
    See more
    • 35w
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